It's been a while since I've posted over here, sorry about that.
I get busy, and distracted by the mix of photography, writing and the many things that life throws at me over the course of the weeks as they seem to fly by.
I suppose we all do though, don't we?
Well, I finally finished and got my fourth book out there! It's a rather dark tale, nothing truly like anything I've ever published before. I'm rather happy with it, even though as I wrote it some of the scenes shocked me, silly right?
If you get a chance to read it you will understand I'm sure.
You can find it here.
The cover...yes, this is really me on the cover, in fact a print of this photo hangs in my dining room.
What a lovely way to make people look at you differently right? I was a size 14 when I took this self portrait actually so I'm rather proud of it.
What? you want to read a little bit of the new book?
Oh I'm pretty sure I can manage that.
Here...I'll show you Chapter 8, and, welcome to my dark side!
Chapter Eight
Nathan hadn’t been happy at all with what
Higgens had told her, he was furious that he was expected to just leave her
alone now. She explained it over and over and still he was refusing to
understand. When she finally pointed out that one week wasn’t that long to wait
and it was what she needed he relented.
"One
more week to wait for you is worth it Elle." They were parked in her
driveway and he kissed her softly his lips lingering on hers as though they
would stay there forever had she but asked. "I would wait for you
forever."
She
went into the house alone, refusing to watch him drive away like always. She
had never been able to watch him leave, something inside her afraid that he
wouldn’t return, wouldn’t want to return. He had always left something of
importance behind to remind her that he would come back and she smiled, looking
around for what she was sure he had left behind.
It
was hidden in her purse, his Blackberry. Now this was something he surely
needed but he had left it with her, the reminder he always gave her no matter
what. Feeling silly she wandered her home with the blackberry held to her
chest, slowly relaxing. She would call her Mother tomorrow she decided, there
was just too much on her mind tonight and she was so tired right now.
She
went to her room and got ready for bed, too tired to even think of dinner or
anything else but sleep. She set the alarm to get her up for her other
appointment in the morning and then slid between the cool sheets, the bed
feeling lonely without Nathans warmth beside her.
She
pushed that thought away and remembered to take her medicine. Feeling guilty
that she hadn’t confessed to Dr Higgens that she hadn’t been taking it regularly
lately, she promised herself to remember it more often. She slipped back into
bed and tried to sleep but in spite of her exhaustion she couldn’t seem to
drift off. Wandering downstairs again in her restlessness she lit the wood
already laid out in the fireplace and turned on some music. It always calmed
her to have music around and she hoped it would ease her restless feeling
tonight. She opened the book she had tried to read the other night and pulled
pillows and a throw blanket down on the floor in front of the fire, deciding
that she would read herself to sleep.
She
found herself getting lost in the book, smiling and laughing out loud at the
antics of Stephanie Plum in her favorite of Janet Evanovich's stories. As the
night wore on she finally felt herself drifting off to sleep and was relieved.
She contemplated getting up and going to her room but she just didn’t want to
move.
Setting
the book down she closed her eyes and listened to the music that was lulling
her to sleep. Imogen Heap again…why was it that she hadn’t wanted to listen to
her for a while again? Pulling the throw blanket up to her chin she smiled, not
concerned that she couldn’t really remember why, knowing it would come to her
eventually. As Imogen's voice rose into the song ‘Just for Now’ she wanted to
cry, for the drifting slide into the world of dreams was rushing over her and
she knew she wasn’t truly sleeping yet.
***
‘There’s my good girl.’ It was the
voice again of my dream lover as I feel the covers being lowered over my body.
These dreams have been so realistic; who knew that imagination could be so
wonderful. As his hands begin to knead my breasts I find myself anticipating
what he would do tonight.
Again my hands are drawn up over my head and
held there as his hands begin to work their magic over my body. Stroking my
skin with light and delicate touches he explores every inch of me that is
exposed. My arms and legs, the valley between my breasts are traced with hands
and lips as I sigh in contentment.
‘Don’t ever wear something like this to bed
again.’ His voice is firm, commanding even as I feel his hands grip the
neckline of my sheer negligee. Then with a sudden motion to emphasize his words
the material rips wide, leaving me totally exposed to his gaze and touch.
My eyes open wide at this unexpected violence,
in the dream he had been forceful but not like this. Then I smile and remember
that it‘s just a dream and wonder if perhaps I really would like someone to want me badly enough to rip my clothes
off. It felt pretty nice to have someone want her that much come to think of
it.
‘I have watched you for so long, pretty.’ The
material of my nightgown was being torn into strips in front of me. ‘I have so
much to show you, so much I plan to do to you. You are mine.’
This was a little eerie, but keeping in mind
that it’s a dream I relax and wait. I felt hypnotized by the material shredding
itself to long strips in front of my eyes. As the gown is done being demolished
strips are bound first around my wrists and then around my eyes.
The feeling was one of helpless excitement and
I found that I liked it very much. This was something that I had never really
thought of before and I was definitely enjoying what my subconscious was
creating for me.
‘Such pretty little titties.’ The hands were
firm, just bordering on rough as they grasped my breasts and began to knead
them again. My nipples hardened instantly and I gasped at the pleasure that
shot through me at this gentle roughness I was experiencing.
His tongue began to tease my nipples, as his
hands grew rougher yet, squeezing my breasts and then letting them go. I began
to whimper in protest but was commanded to be quiet. Surprised I lay there,
feeling almost ashamed as I slowly began to enjoy the pressure of his tongue on
my nipples along with the brief flashes of mild pain his hands were causing.
‘You like this pretty. You like this.’ His
voice still resounded in my head as his hands move down my body, gentle and
soothing now.
I open my mouth to speak, only to find it
covered with a hand.
‘No, no talking from you. That’s not what I
need your mouth for.’ Suddenly I was off
the bed and kneeling on the floor, I assumed, facing the bed now. My knees hurt
from the quick fall to the floor and my hands were still bound in front of me.
Hands wrapped themselves in my
hair, twisting it and pulling my head forward. I felt the hard length of his
cock in front of me, the head of it brushing against my lips and I knew what he
wanted. Opening my mouth I licked at the throbbing flesh in front of me, hoping
that if I pleased him he would be gentler. But evidently he was angry with me
for some reason and he pulled at my hair, forcing his hard cock all the way
into my mouth, stretching my jaw wide.
He adjusted the angle and forced
his thickness down into my throat and then holding my head still kept it there.
Soon I was straining to breathe and swallowing reflexively to keep from
gagging. He was groaning and telling me what a good girl I was until I had
spots dancing before my eyes from lack of air. Then he let me go and pushed me
back onto the floor as I gasped in the precious oxygen.
‘That, Pretty, is all I need that
lovely mouth of yours for. It does only what I tell it to do…do you understand
me?’
‘Yes.’ I gasped still struggling
for air.
He said nothing more, just moved me
back onto the bed, lying on my back with my legs dangling over the edge.
Spreading them wide he moved between them and thrust into me hard and fast. He
slammed into me over and over again and I bit my lip to keep from crying out.
He yelled as he came inside me, I could feel his release throbbing inside my
now well used body and was torn between relief and disappointment.
He moved me again, rolling me onto
my stomach and propping my hips up with pillows. He was telling me what a good
girl I was, how he was proud of me, how I was his. It was all so confusing, why
was I dreaming this instead of something I WANTED to dream about?
He stroked the sensitive flesh that
was now slick with his release and told me that I could now speak, only unable
to say the word ‘no’ to him. Soon enough his touch had me moaning as his
fingers slid in and out of me, one hand pressing against my clitoris as I
ground my hips against the pressure. I was nearing a climax when I felt him
tracing the outline of my anal opening with his slick fingers. I opened my
mouth to tell him not to but couldn’t bring myself to say no; almost afraid of
what he might do if I refused him.
He did nothing more than keep the
pressure there though, for whatever reason he may have had for it. Soon enough
I was crying out in relief as my orgasm took me over, leaving me sweating and
panting for air as I lay there blind and spread open before him.
***
She snapped back into reality with a half
scream escaping her lips. It wasn’t that the dream had been so very violent or
frightening that unnerved her. It was the man in the dream that scared her, he
wanted something more than she was willing to give. He wanted complete control
over her, body and soul and the very thought of it terrified her to no end.
She
rushed upstairs and took a shower, scrubbing her skin repeatedly until the
water ran cold and she finally felt that she had washed the dream away. She
never slept that night, disturbed by the direction her dream state had taken
her, it hadn’t been bad when the man in the dreams was Nathan for she knew that
he loved her and wanted her to be happy.
There
was a feeling of dread stealing over her; the instinctive knowledge that there
was something very wrong that was going to happen. As the dawn spilled crimson
across the sky she rose from her bed and wandered down to the kitchen. Coffee
in hand she finally went to the stereo and removed her Imogen Heap CD from it
and threw it on the still warm coals in the fireplace. Perhaps it was foolish but
she felt relief steal over her as she watched it melt into nothingness.
Well, I hoped you enjoyed this little peek into the story, as always, thanks for reading!
Melanie
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